April 11. Four years ago today, Russ tied a dozen or so notes we’d written each other and strings of lights to the trees by the creek at my mom and dad’s farm and got down on one knee and asked me, in the sweetest way, to marry him. As obnoxious as it sounds, I’d … Continue reading April 11
This one is to you – you who sent us flowers and gifts right after our procedures last summer you who’ve made us warm meals on down days you who brought over pizza and beer when we just needed time with friends you who mailed us books about coping after miscarriage you who didn’t ask … Continue reading To you
I don’t have much positive to say about 2018, but my hope is that in the years ahead, we’ll look back and see the lessons we learned and they’ll be valuable. One lesson I’m already learning is how important it is to take care of yourself. I’m not sure I fully understood self-care as a … Continue reading To 2019
When I started the medications for the retrieval part of the IVF process my brother joked that I was going to be a bit of an emotional challenge. It’s not an off-the-wall prediction to say that pumping extra hormones into your body might make your brain react in weird ways. I actually braced myself for … Continue reading Hormones, people. Ugh.
I just found this in a drawer. I’d forgotten i bought it. Last July we briefly thought I was pregnant, thanks to either a faulty test or a chemical pregnancy. That week I went out and bought this book for our future son or daughter. I still can’t wait to introduce our kids to my … Continue reading I just found this in a drawer
I can’t even tell you how many 400 meter hurdle races I’ve run in my life, but there’s a very distinct pattern to the emotion of my favorite race. Like every track event it starts with the adrenaline at the starting line, a burst of energy or even a chill as you place your feet … Continue reading Results (so far)
This is a look at my meds through phase one of the process. One shot and three pills in the mornings. Two shots and one pill at night. The box full of meds still waiting for after the egg retrieval is daunting, but I’ll face that when it gets here. The morning shot is the … Continue reading details
A few years ago when Russ and I were newly engaged we spent Record Store Day in late April going from store to store in Greenville picking up records. I couldn’t tell you how many we bought that day, but there was a stack of three or four we were given for free. They were … Continue reading Update
I did it. I survived my first night of giving myself shots and I didn’t even panic. I felt fine about it all day and there was a brief moment right before when I had to pause and just say aloud “this seemed less terrifying before I actually had to do it.” Then, dressed … Continue reading I can do this!
Russ and I are both that type of big baby grown-ups who can’t handle needles. Do we have tattoos? No. Is it because we don’t think they’re cool? Nah. It’s because I’m the kind of person who feels queasy at the idea of a needle touching skin and Russ is the kind of person whose … Continue reading Fertility stuff: Update 3
I swear we haven’t forgotten to update, we’re just in a waiting period. That said, I couldn’t let Infertility Awareness week pass without saying something. So here’s what’s going on — The timeline has changed since the last time I wrote. We were originally expecting Russ to have surgery in late May and thought all … Continue reading Update 2